Jokes And Funny Stories For Children - 11

This is page 11 of jokes and funny stories for children.

My brother read a book about Davy Crockett.
He said, 'Did you know Davy Crockett had three ears?'
I said, 'No, I didn't.'
He said, 'Well he did you know. He had a right ear, a left ear and a wild frontear.'

There were these two cannibals having their tea. One said to the other, 'I don't like your friend.'
The other one said, 'Well put him to one side and just eat the greens.'

My brother said, 'I'm going to become a forger. I'm going to make some big money.'
I said, 'Don't make it too big or someone'll notice.'

My brother said, 'I've just been reading a book about Samson. He was an amazing comedian.',br> I said, 'Was he really?'
My brother said, 'Yes, he brought the house down.'

My brother said, 'I want a job as a human cannonball.'
I said, 'I'll bet you get fired.'

My uncle said to me, 'Ants have got amazing brains.'
I said, 'Have they?'
He said, 'Yes. Have you noticed how they always know when you're having a picnic.'

My sister came running in from the kitchen. She said, 'Dad, there's a black cat out there.',br> My dad said, 'So what? Black cats are lucky.'
My sister said, 'This one is. It's just eaten your lunch.'

Did you hear about the steamroller driver who ran over a biscuit?
He said, 'Crumbs.'

My uncle said, 'The RSPCA are going to closedown my fish and chip shop.'
I said, 'Why's that?'
He said, 'They think I'm battering the fish.'

There were these two elephants arguing over who should go in the swimming pool first. I said, 'Why don't you both go in at the same time?'
They said, 'We can't. We've only got one pair of trunks between us.'

A Joke At Random
How many Einsteins does it take to change a light bulb?
That depends on the speed of the changer, and the mass of the bulb. Or vice versa, of course. Then it just might be easier to leave the bulb alone and change the room. It's all relative.
You can find more like this in the Changing Lightbulbs Jokes category

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