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Jokes and Funny Stories about Doctors

 

Jokes and Funny Stories about doctors and the medical profession.

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jokes about doctors


An accountant is having trouble getting to sleep at night so he goes to see his doctor. "Doctor, I just can't get to sleep at night."
"Have you tried counting sheep?"
"That's the problem - I make a mistake and then spend the next three hours trying to find it."


Patient: Doctor, doctor I keep thinking that I can see into the future.
Doctor: And when did this happen?
Patient: Next Wednesday.


Patient: Doctor, I feel very ill. I think that I ate too many oysters last night.
Doctor: Were the oysters fresh?
Patient: I don't know if they were fresh or not?
Doctor: Well, what did they look like when you opened them?
Patient: You mean you have to open them?


Patient: Doctor, you must help me I keep thinking that I'm a crossword puzzle.
Doctor: Is it getting you down?


Doctor: How did you get here so quickly?
Patient: Flu.


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Patient: This morning I was walking across a field and was trampled by some cows.
Doctor: So I herd.


Doctor, doctor. I think that I'm turning into a baby cat.
I think you're just kitten me.


Doctor, doctor, I've got a little sty.
Well you'd better buy a little pig for it then.


Doctor, doctor, I keep thinking I'm a slice of bread.
Doctor: You've need to stop loafing around.


Doctor: Have you ever had this problem before?
Patient: Yes.
Doctor: Well, you've got it again!



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A Joke At Random


Will: How much will it cost to take me to the train station?
Taxi driver: Five dollars, sir.
Will: How much will you charge to take my suitcase?
Taxi driver: There's no charge for the suitcase.
WIll: In that case, take the suitcase and I'll walk.

You can find more like this in the Miscellaneous Jokes category



 

 

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