Jokes & Funny Stories About Cannibals

Some very old and corny jokes and funny stories about cannibals.

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A pilot was flying over the jungle when he started having engine trouble. Eventually the engine stopped and he realised that he would have to bail out before it lost too much height and crashed. So he put on his parachute and jumped out of the door. He pulled the rip cord, his parachute opened and he floated gently down towards a clearing in the jungle. Unfortunately he landed right in the middle of a large cooking pot in which the chief of the cannibals was cooking lunch. The chief cried out in astonishment, "whats this flier doing in my soup?"

"I don't think much of your wife."
"Well, never mind just eat the vegetables."

What do cannibals eat for breakfast?
Buttered host.

What did the cannibal say when he met the famous explorer?
Doctor Livingstone, I consume?

1st Cannibal: Am I late for supper?
2nd Cannibal: Yes everybody's eaten.

What happened when the cannibals ate a comedian?
They had a feast of fun.

A sign over a cannibal's hut: "I never met a man I didn't like."

What do the guests do at a cannibal wedding?
They toast the bride and groom.

Father Cannibal To Daughter: It's time you got married. We'll start looking for an edible bachelor.

What did one cannibal say to another?"Who was that girl I saw you with last night?"
"That was no girl, that was my supper."

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A Joke At Random

There was once a great czar in Russia named Rudolph the Red. He stood looking out the windows of is palace one day while his wife, the Czarina Katerina, sat nearby knitting. He turned to her and said, "Look my dear, it has begun to rain!" Without even looking up from her knitting she replied, "It's too cold to rain. It must be sleeting." The Czar shook his head and said, "I am the Czar of all the Russias, and Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear!"

You can find more like this in the Christmas category