Jokes And Funny Stories About Animals

 

Here are some jokes and funny stories about animals including dogs, horses and ducks.

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My friend says that you can speak in cat language. Is it true?
Me - how?

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What happens to frogs that are illegally parked?
They get toad away.

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What was the name of the small horse that fought windmills?
Donkey Oatey.

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What swings from a trapeze and miaows?
An acrocat.

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How can you tell if a chicken likes you?
It gives you a peck on the cheek.

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Every dog has its day, only a dog with a broken tail has a weak-end.

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Joe: Last night the lion-tamer at the circus was attacked by his lions.
Brian: Was he clawed?
Joe: I don't know what is name was.

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A man walked into a pet shop and said, 'I'd like a puppy for my son.'
'Sorry sir,' said the store owner, 'we don't do part exchange.'

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Two dogs were walking along the road. One dog stopped and said: "My name is Fido. What's yours?
The other dog thought for a minute, and then replied: "I think it's Down Boy."

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A women was considering buying an aging Thoroughbred but wanted a veterinarian's opinion of the horse before finalizing her deal. She asked when the vet had completed his examination - "Will I be able to race him?"
The veterinarian looked at the woman, then at the horse. "Sure" he replied, "and you'll probably win!"

A Joke At Random

The thunder god went for a ride on his favourite horse,
'I'm Thor' he cried.
The horse replied:
'You forgot the thaddle, thilly.'

You can find more like this in the Animal Jokes category